A post on the poll

well chums i think it is finally time for some descriptions on what the poll is about so we can have a more general idea of which really does sound nastier. luckily to save my time and yours i have found a list that someone has already compiled so i am just going to copy and paste. then i will comment on the ones he got wrong or add in ones that he missed. well lets get this thing started before i get too excited. alright its done. the times new roman is him and these letters are mine.

Here is a fairly extensive compilation of some of the

extraordinary sexual activities that can be performed by men:

1. Hot Lunch - While receiving head from a woman, you proceed
to shit on her chest. (A.k.a. the Cleveland Steamer)the cleveland steamer is when you shit on her chest then drag her out into the cold to watch it steam, hence the steamer
2. The Stranger - Sitting on your hand until it falls asleep
and then jerking off, eliciting the feeling of a hand job from someone else. this is for lonely people
3. Western Grip- When jerking off, turn your hand around, so
that your thumb is facing towards you. It is the same grip that rodeo folks use. Hence, western. this one just sounds unpleasant and strange
4. The Blumpkin- You need to find a real tramp to do this
right. It involves having her sucking you off while you are on the shitter. one of my good friends always wanted to try this. he said it must be like the best of both worlds combined. he was odd.
5. Donkey Punch - Banging a girl doggy style and then moments
before you cum, sticking your dick in her ass, and then punching her in the
back of the head. This gives a tremendous sensation, but for it to work correctly,
the girl must be knocked out so that her asshole tightens up. i dont know where he got his facts from, but i never heard about any ass play in the donkey punch. what it is supposed to be is that right before you cum you punch her in the kidneys as hard as you can which makes the snatch tighten which induces the extra pleasure.
6. Golden Shower - Any form of pissing all over a chick (a.k.a.- watersports) this is just nasty, why would people like r kelly like this
7. Pearl Necklace - Well known. Whenever you cum on the
neck/cleavage area of a girl - it takes on the look of beautiful jewelry. i like how he calls it beautiful jewelry.
8. Coyote - This occurs when you wake up in the room of a nasty
wombat and you know you've got to give her the slip. However
you realize that your arm is wrapped around her. Therefore you must
gnaw off your own arm to get out of the situation. Can be very painful. this one is a bit far fetched. i mena the other could happen, this one, not so much.
9. Purple Mushroom - This occurs when a woman is giving you
oral sex and you withdraw your penis in order to poke it back into her cheek.
It should leave a lasting impression similar to purple mushroom. this guy just got this one completely wrong. the purple mushroom is merely an imprint on a girls face when you slap her with your penis. you could be doing anything not necessarily getting oral sex. you could be at the store buying groceries, or driving you car.
10. The Flying Camel - A personal favorite. As she is lying on her back and you are hammering her from your knees, you carefully balance yourself without using your arms to prop yourself up. You then proceed to flap your arms and let out a long, shrieking howl, much like a coyote. Strictly a class move. indeed very classy, id like to see someone pull this off in a real serious movie. they could have put it in titanic instead of the sex in the car seen. that was just lame
11. Fishhook - A variation of the shocker in which you pull
back towards the pussy after you stick your finger up her anus. this one has another definition. the fishhook is also when you are hitting it from behind and then you reach forward and get a crooked finger into her mouth jerking her face back, like a fish
12. The Ram - Again, you're attacking from behind, when you
start ramming her head against the wall in a rhythmic motion. The
force of the wall should allow for deeper penetration. Very handy for those lulls in penile sensitivity. i like what he has done here using the word attacking
13. Bismarck- This is another one involving oral sex. Right before
you are about to cum, you pull out, shooting your load all over her face. Follow that with a punch and smear the blood and cum together. and this would be your garden variety strawberry short cake with the blood being strawberries and the cum being cream
14. Jelly Dougnut: A derivation of the Bismark. All you have to
do is punch her in the nose while you are getting head. i dont think you could punch someone in the nose during fellatio, and certainly wouldnt want to if you could.
15. The Woody Woodpecker: When a girl is sucking on your balls,
tap the head of your cock on her forehead. hahahhahahaha this one is in good taste
16. Dog in a Bathtub - This is a proper name for when you
attempt to insert your nuts into a girl's ass. It is so named because it
can be just as hard as keeping a dog in the tub while giving it a bath. it seems to me trying to shove your balls into someone ass would result in squeezing of said nuts, which would fucking hurt. although i do like how they came up with the name
17. Tossing Salad - Another prison act where one person is
forced to basically chow asshole with the help of whatever condiments are
available, i.e. Jell-O, olive oil, etc. I'm never going to prison. thats just awful imagine if they gave you relish
18. Rim Job: Another name for tossing salad. Focuses on the use
of the tongue. rim job and tossing salads are the same thing. but not necessarily with condiments. that is sickening
19. The Bucking Bronco- An all time classic. You start by going
doggy style on a girl and then just when she is really enjoying it, you grab onto her tits or hips as tightly as possible and call her a big fat no-good worthless slob. More than likely, she will try to escape. This will give you the feeling of riding a bronco as she tries to buck you off. generally you would say something more along the lines of "yea this is just how your sister likes it" or you could insert someone elses name or another family member. basically anthing you wouldnt normally say that was meant to offend.
20. Pink glove - This frequently happens during sex when a girl is not wet enough.
When you pull out to give her money, the inside of her twat sticks to your hog. Thus, the pink glove. i have never had that happened but if it did i would shit a brick
21. The Fountain of You - While sitting on her face and having
her eat your ass, jerk off like a madman. Build up as much pressure
as possible before releasing, spewing like a venerable geyser all
over her face, neck and tits. (Better in her bed). yea no shit better in her bed. jesus that is awful
22. New York Style Taco - Anytime when you are so drunk that
when you go down, you boot on her box. Happy trails. i just might vomit thinking about that
23. The Dirty Sanchez - A time honored event in which while
laying the bone doggie style, you insert Your finger into said woman's asshole, pull it out, wipe it across her upper lip leaving a thin, shit moustache. This makes her look like someone whose name would be Dirty Sanchez. classic
24. The Fish Eye - From behind, you shove your finger in her
ass (or his if you are in prison). Thereupon she turns around in a one-eyed
winking motion to see what the hell you are doing. excellent visualization.
25. Tuna Melt - You're down on a chick lapping away and
discover that it just happens to be the time of the month. By no means do you
stop though. When the whale spews, tartar sauce with a hint of raspberry
smothers your face. sweet jesus people are fucked up. fuck the hint of raspberry
26. Fur Ball - You're chomping away at some mighty trollop who
has a mane between her legs the size of Lionel Richie's Afro, when a mammoth fur ball gets lodged in your throat and causes you to beat the piss out of her. another one that makes you throw up a little bit in your mouth
27. The ChiliDog - You take a shit on a girl's tits and then
proceed to titty fuck her. i never would have thought to do that, i suppose if you take her out into the cold and do it you could call it a cleveland chilidog
28. Gaylord Perry: Going to only one knuckle during an anal
probe is for wimps. Make this famous knuckle ball pitcher proud and use multiple
knuckles on that virgin corn hole. A minimum of two knuckles required (either
on one finger or on multiple). hahaha that guys name was gaylord.
29. Rear Admiral: An absolute blast. When getting a chic from
behind (while both partners standing), make sure you don't let her grab on to
anythingwhen she is bent over. Then, drive your hips into her backside
so that you end up pushing her forward. The goal is to push her into a wall or table. It's almost as much fun to have her trip on her face on the floor. You become an Admiral when you can push her around the room without crashing into anything and not using your hands to grab onto her hips. this one is too fucking amusing not to be good. i want to be an admiral but that sounds fuckin hard
30. Glass Bottom Boat: Putting saran wrap over your partners
face and proceeding to lay a hot shit there. this would be nasty just to see someone else do it
31. Ray-Bans: Put your testicles over her eye sockets while
getting head.
(Picture it: ass on forhead) It may be anatomically impossible,
but it is definitely worth a try. i agree this might be impossible
32. Snowmobile: Always a blast. When getting a girl while she's
on all fours, sweep out her arms so she falls on her face. if i was sitting down i might have fallen out of my chair this one is so fucking funny
33. Dutch Oven: Rather simple. Whenever you bust ass while in
the sack pull the covers over both of your head so she can enjoy your pork and beans as well. and last but not least my favorite. also i just realized that as i was doing this the other letters were changing so it isnt my fault but i think you can figure out which comments were mine, if not you may not be smart enough to be on this website. alrighty then kids out there in tv land yall take it easy and until next time no new york tacos or tuna melts.