Why the world is going to shit

It is your fault. We all blame you. All you kids born after 1985 are ruining the world. And i dont want to hear your whining about how it isnt your fault. Part of the reason the world is going to shit is because you whine to much. This is a direct result of parents not beating their children properly anymore. Even a spanking would help you bastards. What we got when we were bad was no a mere spanking. Oh no. My mom would grab whatever was closest, generally something wooden. And start beating me with it. I think she enjoyed the sound of the wood cracking when she hit me hard enough. Another reason the world is going to shit because of you is video games. at least we were old enough when nintendo came out that we had some years of experience in playing outside. You fuckers need ever thing handed to you. Just take your punk ass outside, find a tree and pretend its a fort. Or at least invent a new game. We invented smear the queer, this is not a game about gays though. Essentially what would happen was one kid would come with the ball. it could be any kind of ball(that was our imaginations working). then the guy with the ball would throw it and who ever caught it would run until he got smeared by everyone else. it was an excellent game and it helped us to stay slim. back in the day there werent chubby little kids. another game we had was kick the can. this game has many different rules, we mainly played two ways. first you use a crushed can as a ball(imagination again) then you could either set up two goals made from whatever you had with you. generally peoples shirts would end up being goals. or you could play the street version. this was usually saved for when you had to walk somewhere (thats right our moms didnt have minivans to take us everywhere you fuckin pansies). This method involves kicking the ball, can, down the street as you walk. The trick is to keep it in front of you, thats the genius of using the cans see. The can is oddly shaped and thus when kicked it goes in all sorts of directions. another reason the wolrd is going to shit is private school. now i realize that i am a preppy bastard who went to a private school, however the difference between me and you is that i am older and we went outside during lunch to play killer ultimate frisbee. this is an excellent sport which was subsequently banned halfway through my junior year. the reason we called it killer ultimate frisbee was because we added tackling to it. let me explain. in regular ultimate frisbee you throw it and the guy who catches stops in two steps and then has time to throw. in killer ultimate the person throws it and then the guys catches it. once caught you must start looking for someone to throw it to because no doubt someone is sprinting at you full speed looking to tackle you as hard as they can. thats what makes it fun. and finally for the last reason the world is turning to shit because of you. its because you are soft. after a lifetime of video games and internet porn your weak body and mind are no match for your elders. it should work the other way(check out my old people blog for reference to the way things ought to work) we the older are smarter because of our years and we know what people ought to do. unlike you pansies, with your tight pants(losers), goth (dorks), computers (computer kids), art(scaggots), volkwagon beetles (douches), personalized license plates (fucking losers), pants that have zippers to make them shorts (spazes), and so many other faults that i cant think of now. and i am sure you are all crying and saying to yourself that i am not perfect and that my shit does stink and i have faults to. well i agree now i will tell them all to you. firstly i could be faster and stronger. and secondly i am too handsome and it makes all the ladies go wild. thirdly, well there is no thirdly i am as close to amazing as you can get for being born in 1985. oh yea also i forget stuff but at least i can concentrate you a-d-d bastards.