Showing posts with label drinking. Show all posts
Showing posts with label drinking. Show all posts
Saturday, June 14, 2008
DRINKING, It's not so bad
Well hullo again laddies and lasses. today we will be talking about something near and dear to my heart and most likely yours as well, drinking. and i am not just talking about juice and milk and sweet tea. oh no we are talking about booze, the hard stuff, the sauce, hooch, brew, libations, spirits, jiggers, and intoxicants. in short the stuff you drink that gets you fucked up. where does this idea come from i am sure you are asking yourselves this very minute.(notice how i say yourselves, this is because i know that there are many people gathered around you so that they too can enjoy scrappys) well it came from one of the best tv shows ever made. it is called Lucky Louie and it stars Louis C. K. it is super cool. check it out. so why do so many people think beer and stuff is bad? the answer is really simple, they must not be drinkers, or are not currently drinking. and that can be annoying. thats kind of the problem with having a DD. being around drunk people is cool, but only if you are also drunk. otherwise it just makes you realize how annoying people are when they are drunk. thats why i think rather than suggesting people get DD's they should make a law where if you can blow a .19 blood alcohol level then you should get a free cab home. then it would be like a contest to see who could get there the fastest. it would be win win. the bar owners would sell a whole shit load of beer because there arent a bunch of non drinking assholes filling up the bar. and they could hook up the cab drivers with some of their extra money to do the free taxi service. but there would definitely have to be a steep fine for puking in the taxi when you are getting a free ride. well gang i have run out of steam for tonite. but if you would like to see just what a bunch of pansies all the stupid scad kids are check out there bitchy Rant and Raves from our hometown craigslist. until next time remember that you have to eat you meat before you get any pudding. how can you eat your pudding if you havent eaten your meat?
Wednesday, February 27, 2008
The 90th blog
Well team we have made it. almost at least. Only 10 more blogs and we will be there. or maybe not. what could happen before those 10 posts go down. well first off figuring we each do 1 a day we will only take 5 days to do it. however sometimes we fall behind a bit in our blogging due to a lack of privacy at the work space or just a general laziness. not to mention i have a day off in the middle of those ten days. what if i go to jail, it could be days until i get out, then we may never make the deadline. what if we decide to rob something and get gunned down during an elaborate escape. or what if we eat ourselves to death going to an all you can eat buffet of everything everywhere. it could happen. if that kind of buffet where to exist and i were to find it and was able to get the early bird special for 6.95. yes i think i could eat my self to death. but they wouldnt have a buffet with everything everywhere, not that was open early enough for an early bird buffet. that would be to good to be true. another thing that could happen is a tsunami could hit georgia and we would all be washed away. then we wouldnt have the internet. also we might be dead. in either case it could take months to get to that oh so unattainably magical 100th blog. what if we are walking home from work and we get attacked by a pack of angry wolves. that could happen, shit the other day i saw a hawk flying over the city. that means that there is certainly a pack of angry wolves downtown as well somewhere. perhaps sleeping in the dumpsters at night and on sundays inside the liquor stores. well those are are very probable reasons why we might not make the 100, but what about what will happen when we do.
first off there will be fireworks. and im not just talking about snakes and sparklers. we will have bottle rockets and black cats and m 80s, cherry bombs, smoke bombs, plus some snakes and sparklers. then there will be a three day parade. the first day there will be floggings of all known and unknown non-readers whom we find during the day one drinking and flogging fest. day is composed of eating and parading about town with a large ticker tape parade towards the end. the third day we have the greatest show on earth. we have a circus with elephants and rhinos and giraffes, zebras, emus, all the good stuff. plus we have some gladiator fights with people and monkeys, not to mention monkey knife fights, large animal fights. and for the little ones penguins fights with jello shots. after the three day parade and festivities we get back to life as we know it but know we have some new experiences and good times to think on. it will be swell so cross your fingers and your toes and your eyes until we make that 100. if you do we will give you a chance at winning 100 dollars in a raffle and cake walk competition.
first off there will be fireworks. and im not just talking about snakes and sparklers. we will have bottle rockets and black cats and m 80s, cherry bombs, smoke bombs, plus some snakes and sparklers. then there will be a three day parade. the first day there will be floggings of all known and unknown non-readers whom we find during the day one drinking and flogging fest. day is composed of eating and parading about town with a large ticker tape parade towards the end. the third day we have the greatest show on earth. we have a circus with elephants and rhinos and giraffes, zebras, emus, all the good stuff. plus we have some gladiator fights with people and monkeys, not to mention monkey knife fights, large animal fights. and for the little ones penguins fights with jello shots. after the three day parade and festivities we get back to life as we know it but know we have some new experiences and good times to think on. it will be swell so cross your fingers and your toes and your eyes until we make that 100. if you do we will give you a chance at winning 100 dollars in a raffle and cake walk competition.
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