Anticipating

Well sportsfans, the real sportsfans, its just about that time, beer t.v. and some motha fuckin football. I myself will be looking forward to some serious time with an old friend and the practice of the most brutal sport with him, all my good pals in the sandbox will riding high and feelin fly come the end of this month. All in all its just a good time in the life and times of the man known as Nikia Jones, then of course those tasty morsels of cheekiness from the gun man himself. I did stumble upon something rather cool. Yeah i know, its the shit. Moving right along, you gotta check out the new machete movie, its gonna be filled with all kind of cool ass pencas. Yeah. Its gonna be the shit! In other news apparently you only get a ticket in Effingham county for a zone on a routine traffic stop. Also its still illegal to be brown and proud, so fuck the man and his plan. Last but not least, there's the snitches, one that beleive that they appear as plain as one does in there everyday casual wear, but the scent of pork is far too over bearing to even conceive letting your guard down. Thats all for now citizens of gotham, slack a little and hold it down, ya boy is out.

The Knight Rider car

Well gang im back once again and it is of course totally awesome. I have been working the morning shift lately and my boss is all up in my ass so i cant get as much blogging done as i would like. luckily i have an excellent topic to day so you will get quality instead of quantity. Let me ask you a question, what is the coolest car ever? The answer is Kitt the car from knight rider. what a bad ass car, it had the red light in the front that let you know the car was talking, it went fast, if you recall it would go almost 200 mph. pretty bad ass eh? but the reason of this blog isnt just to throw deserved praise on a bad ass car, it is to point out the the original Kitt probably was a gas guzzler. this makes it so ordinary folks like myself cant get one. and we are the people who need cars like that more than anyone else. so here is my idea. we are going to get a black honda civic, give it some tent and then we will attach one of those red lights to the front of it and BAMMO we have a sweet as car very similar to the original Kitt. BAD ASS! but wait we can make it better, thats right i said BETTER. but how you ask? with this. Thats right that is a fucking GPS that talks like Kitt. HOLY SHIT this honda is now truly a mini gas saving Kitt. we have done the unthinkable turned a car no one wants and made it into something everyone NEEDS. looks like its fixing to go down now. i can hear the commericials now. " So you want to get laid but dont know how? Well look no further buy this car now and get laid TONITE!!" this of course would be a monster truck rally annoucer. oh yea, or maybe we could get randy the macho man savage to do it. hell yea. another way to get laid of course is to be like this guy and wear a spandex suit with a picture of yourself on it jumping through a brick wall, does it get any cooler than that. hell no. well guys this has been totally awesome and i hope to be back soon. but until then as always yall be easy on the peasy

On the spot

Never tense, just relaxed, eyes fixed in the general direction of the one causing this confrontation to escalate into what it has now become. Me vs. another, three slow breaths as i slowly prepare to turn my hands and feet into weapons of pain. Then there's his hands, clenched turning into fist ready to fight me. I glare once more, lose the watch, and the chain, Totally relaxed, my hands already know this dance of death, no fixed position, just centered upon the impact of mits to this half assed excuse of a man. My aim is six inches behind the target, his face hole. He lunges and I merely step a inch back and release my hand loosely snapping my wrist at the second of impact. For a moment I look as though I'm stretching forward with my fist in front of me as though I'm blind, only to recoil and send my left hand on an upward arch that connects beautifully with the chin of this half a fucker. At long last the anger wells up and it is no longer the man no one knows by the name of Nikia Jonez in control, only the instinct to finish what has been started. I pummel and push only grab shirt or a wrist and administer more punishment. It all ends with him on his knees if front of me, lots of dirt and disdain mark his fuckin shit ass face. I can feel my conscience slide back into the controls that have went "lights out" in my dome, and now I truly feel as though this has all come to the end. Mercy is not an emotion that I have alot of, but this stupid fuck is lucky enough to get it in the form of my foot on his shoulder, i push he lays back I get in the Granada and put in the wind.

Just for them cool ass G'z

Well my loyal and well educated scrapians, before we get to the brass tax of the past month let us once again send up a big fuck you to the man, letting him down one cool ass motherfucker at a time. Next, big shouts to the gun man himself, i will be hitting your neck of the woods in a matter of a couple of weeks. And of course before we burst the perverbiable bubble, a BIG ass eat shit and die to the new found racist who have dedicated themselves to the removal of best side of ya boy himself. Now then, if you know like i do, there are those who stand out in your mind as far as cool, and altogether a chill ass mofo. This blog is dedicated to all who have jumped in a losing battle for the sake of having your back alone. For any and everybody that has one of those scars you bear with pride, the experience in gaining it and the story of what lead up to the events when that particular tissue was once still imaculate as can be. Last but please beleive not least, all them Glennville Gangstas, now spread all over the beloved dirty dirty, killinit, kickinit, and stickinit like a stamp. But dont feel left out, if step out at night and catch the sight of the blunt smoking slipping and swaying across the moon in the dead of night, rest assured there are at least 3 otha mothafuckas kickinit old skool with ya right then and there.

Just keeping on keeping on

Well gangsters im back again, once again im sorry its been some time. you know how things go though what with being busy and life and what not. recently things have been going pretty smoothly. just chilling out in the country. annas truck just slap quit on her and i was able to put the battery back in after someone else took it out. pretty amazing for a guy who cant change a tire. if you think thats funny it is. but i just have one thing to say. fuck you. and the horse you came in on for that matter.

i have noticed recently that people seem to be getting stupider. not in just one way in all ways. people driving slow as hell in the fast lane, and then they give you the finger when you pass them in the slow lane. people who can use the internet to find my hotel but cant figure out how to get fucking directions. people who inform you that they are using long distance when they call. i dont give a shit if you are on long distance. if thats an issue to you have you dumb questions ready to go.

on another note i am starting to think working in hotel has made me more bitter. oh well fuck it.
i gotta get ready for an accounting exam and some economics plus a super sweet accounting report on krogers annual reports. sounds like fun i know, but it isnt. but the best part is im only two weeks away from having a day off.

yall come back now, ya here

The stop and stare

Well ladies and gents, hope all is well despite that its hot as hell. I wanna address a new "manuever" if you will, the stope and stare, a fello G whose name will be left out, calls it the glance and glare, anyhow, its pretty fuckin handy for rude waitresses and or servers, and espically folks at the hiltony hilton who think im gonna juggle some chainsaws for them upon checking in and shit. The s and s comes in good with traffic, if you get the chance to pull up next to some jackass who forgot that we all are driving on this particular stretch of road of which he does not hold ownership to just give him the stare as you stop, this may even entice the noted douchebag in question to give you the finger or even yell some obscenities, which may lead to more staring while stopped but fuck that guy you locked him in and now you crackin a grin. (yeah fuck a douche bag) I like to use the s and s when some tries the whole "let me borrow a dollar" routine. Ya know? These are MY dollars for this parking meter, and i dont have a spare cause the man needs more bread to expand and create more evil so the price has went up to 1.00 and hour and i have just enuff to dodge a ticket so NO fuckin shittin hells to the motha fuckin nah you aint copping none of my dollars motha fuckin get a job. Moving right along use it wisely as this can also lead to a sudden lash out of violent behavior. Nobody wants to throw them things in this heat, thats all i gotta say about that killas, yall be easy and keep ya dollars in the console. Nikia out.

The useless info

Alright gentlemen and gentleladies, hope you're a ok and traveling with out delay, Ill waste no time bashing in the brains of those motherfuckin shitty ass infomercials. Where do these numb nutted fools get the balls? The dollar store, the moon, maybe the white house? I want cartoons, and late night scary movies, even an old western with that Clint Eastwood flavor you can savor, but infomercials? Not only is this the most pointless useless mindless ass way to try and promote a product but its an utterly tragic waste of mothafuckin time and effort, and if you can gauge ya boy by now TIME is the only thing in this world i refuse with utter strictness to waste. You're not getting any of it back any time soon and you definetly cant win a time share full of it or win it like the lottery. No my fellow scrapians, this just simply will not fucking do. I mean they even sucked cuck norris in, the total gym does kick a lot of ass, ( yeah i got one off the net) but not because of the fuckin infomercial, or even because of good ol chuck, i just wanted a floor work that would do the trick for arms and legs. Theres that other dildo who sells that stupid slap chop where he half ass raps through it. Commercials suck bad enough, (maybe not the old spice ones) so why inflict even more damage to the world of watchers by gumming the senses with mindless ads for dick fertlizers and slap choppers and silver and gold polishes. What are they paying these people, and ladies, why the fuck would give yourself the nun glaze by bragging on what undergarment keeps the pee in? Those poor bastards, never have i been so apalled by the man and his attempt to scalp a grown ass outta some bread. Afroman said it best when he said fuck the corporate world. Oh yeah, Arizona can still suck my half brown ass cheek, and with that I would also like to wish all of you out and about in the blogosphere a good memorial day weekend. Until next time ya'll keep an extra clip, and dont catch one in the hip.