Getting it in.

Well guys and gals, its been long enough, once again N to the J like yeast will rise to the occasion and make another notch in the blog tree. Lets get right into it. First the weather is really fucked up, for 3 days i can kick it like a soccer ball in my shorts and t shirts. Next thing you know its 3 days of sweaters and jackets and shivering my ass off. Mother nature might be on her period yo. Next, who the fuck thought that the guy who ran a pizza chain internationally would make a good president. I mean really? That dude looked as dumb as them hoes who was trying to holla back at him once he made the GOP. But fuck that shit, i mean im sure any dude stuck managing all of the pizza places in America would get horny and hit on some chicks. But you cant do all that and try our for the white house either. Come to think about it, i still hate bush too. Fuck him with a hot iron trident. Twice. In the other news, people still think global warming is a myth. I'd like to take that guy to Canada and make him take hike up all the mountains that dont have any more ice on them. But lets not wander to far into the muckity muck of shit that sucks. Today were gonna brush up on gettin it in. See you may not know it, (and Im sure lots of you do know) that we all get it in one way or another. You ever get your work out on and you actually feel good enough to kill a man, you may have just got it in. Now if your ride's fuckin up and you fix it good enough to keep killinit for a good minute, nigga you just got it in. If you reading this while your girl is tripping and you aint giving a shit, you sir, are getting it in as you read. Tonight germs and gents thats all the flavor you can savor for now. Ill be back sooner than later to kick it with ya's once more. Dont eat it if it still moving. Ya boy's out!!!!

The savage beast within.

I once heard a phrase or saying that went, "music to soothe the savage beast," i like that alot, makes me think of the music i indulge in on a regular basis. That thought in itself almost seems cheap due to the fact that i myself am a huge lover of almost all types of music world wide. So moving right along sportsfans, you have to know that music can make ya hate the world, ease you into a nap, or just let ya know you my be totally alone and thats still ok. My all time favorite band is Korn, but my favorite listening music of all time is Rammstein. Nothing like the guitar riffs in there music makes me feel more at home. One of the best things about music (to me anyways) is that it is the most versatile things to ever exist. One of the best examples that i can think just off the top of my head is from the movie call the shawshank redemption. The protagonist plays some italian opera music and the whole place almost feels as though they have had the smallest taste of freedom in the longest time. Though some music seems almost seems like a complete waste of time and effort. (that spears bitch and those emo fuckers). For now fellow scrapians i gotta secure some food from a guy named Jimmy last name Johns. Peace you fuckers, and in the words of the old nintendo commercials, Play it Loud.

Mandatory Breeding Laws

Ok, gents and gentiles, like the salad said to the bowl, "lettuce rest im feeling beet." Of all the truths that your boy holds sacred, none are so much more important than that of the title. Mandatory Breeding Laws, reason(s) being are listed as follows.

First, we are well over populated with some dumb ass motherfuckers, Im sure you all know a few more than you should. Having said that, regulation of the amount of dumb asses your allowed to put out would be ideal in order to restrict the flow of stupidity amongst the masses that will one day rule this world. Now when you read the news here recently you'll prolly see a few head lines about how the majority of the kids/adolescents/teenagers, aren't faring too well with newer and more innovative technology, jobs based here in the states being out sourced because of the lack of properly educated professionals to hold these positions down, all of this due to the fact that the world is festering with unwholesome parenting.

The next problem is over population, the problem in itself is just that we all like to bone, me, you, him, her, them, everybody likes to get it in. The problem there is being responsible enough to keep your boys from heading right up stream. Some use pills, some just spread it like peanut but are unwilling to accept the fact that what they have done is just down right shameful. Then you have the selected few who are more than willing to be responsible and even go the whole nine yards to raise a family and make certain that their children know what respect is and the concept of those around you. Something we all as people should have known about since we were able to understand the concept of "me".

Last but most certainly not the least of all, the food, if you calculate it just right, we need to produce the same amount of food in the next 50 years that we have already produced in the past 800 years. That is some sincere shit there. But let us not fret and keep in mind that waste makes haste. Alot of shit has to change for the human populous to live on as the dominant species of this planet, and nothing magical is gonna happen to produce this chain of events that needs to take place. It must come from each and every one of us living and breathing it up all the while taking it for granted. This the man known as Nikia Jonez, you've been informed, now do something worth while or just die doing nothing. Either way we can only hope that its not too late for us all.

The Big TWO SIX

Well gang its that time again. time to fill yall in on whats going down here in the deep and dirty south. mostly it has been way to cold this winter. coldest i can remember in some time. coming up in just a couple weeks ill have yet another birthday. 26 years of age ill be then. not old yet but getting there. in my time here in the great state of georgia many great and terrible things have happened. i think when i was 19 was the best year. or at least the most action packed. i went to college the first time, got away from the moms for the first time, was on my own for the first time. it was pretty crazy. id have to say 23 was the worst. not that any of them were really bad but 23 i remember the least about. probably because nothing really exciting happened. well i did have 6 jobs that year, but not because thats what i wanted. and come tax time it really sucked. moving forward things are on the up and up though. back in the schooling, doing my accounting thing. anytime you want to discuss the merits of the LIFO and FIFO inventory accounting systems just let me know. itll be an invigorating discussion. got some ribs, or maybe some steaks, planned for the big day. and dont yall forget tommy week starts next weekend on the 6th, so get your tommy shirts and tommy flags and let the spirit out!

ThunderCat HOES!!!!!!

What up gang. I must apologize for my absence, however as we all know, sometimes shit gets real. Anyhow i was driving down the road the other day and i was thinking about how much i like the thundercats, and how they say thundercats HO!!!! and then i thought what about an escort service called thundercat hoes!!!!!! First would be Cougra, an older yet still sexy escort looking for the youngsters. Then there would be Cheetara, a hottie who looks just like Cheetara from the original thundercats. Next would be The Siamese and the Gato, an asian chick in a cat suit and a latin chick in a cat suit, respectively. My Escort service would be more popular than the playboy mansion. and that is pretty popular. there are surely more clever names that i could have come up with however i was almost home when i thought of it yesterday and now its almost time to get off work. if you have suggestions for names and maybe some examples of what youd like to see at my service. but its time to blow this pop stand so as always be easy on the peasy and ill try to to be such a stranger anymore.

ps. the stranger is the leading cause of carpal tunnel.

A rose by any other name

Ok, ladies and gents, first i apologize in the lapse here at scrappys as sometimes we all catch a case of the "fuck its". Even when it comes to our blog of choice chock full of the flavor you can savor. Having said that, lets just jump right in the foreign waters of todays blog of choice. Names, namely my first name. In the days of recess and pogs, fucking with my name got you slap punched, and sometimes (due to those who would tell on you in a heartbeat) a joke to do with the opposing persons name would usually do the trick as well. Now having said that, let us analyze and interpret said name. Jesus, not the guy from the "good book" but [hay-zues]. Now the reason that this shit is so goddamn funny is that the unexposed breed of uncultured people in the world today automatically start yelling "that's blasphemy" and "who would name there child after our lord?" Now thats usually the classic response almost each time someone "uncultured" encounters my name. Then there's the brothas and sistas, we always try to have fun with the shit, one time in particular wasnt so funny, as i sit in a doctors waiting room, i see him come to the door, squint, look at the room full of people, squint again, and shout "Jesus" (and no not the above pronunciation either) I stand and slowly approach the doc, and the loudest most ghetto ass black lady imaginable simply stands and asks (out loud at the top of her lungs mind you) "boy what you doing walking around looking like that being named Jesus ?!?!" (at the time i was about 220 lbs. and had long ass hair), but all the same the embarrassment soon ensued and there was nothing left to do but simply inform her that I myself had not chosen such an awesome name the day i was born, rather it was just given to me before my real dad checked out of our lives for good. All in all its usually just damn funny when the name comes about, there's even some cool ass nicknames that I've acquired over the years. But thats all i got for ya's today killas. Yall hold it down and keep ya towels folded.

Beef

OK, so today i have en tasked myself with a rather perplexing situation. It starts with an old friend of mine name "Goofy". Cool guy, hard worker, liked by all his peers, and a funny ass motherfucker. But as all sad stories go in life, Goofy met a terrible terrible terrible terrible end. Goofy passed on to the next life in a ditch, hands full on grass and dirt as he tried to pull himself up and look for help and make sure his attacker was far far away. The attacker in question was a typical redneck ass white bread racist punk mother fucker in a white ass town that doesn't like anyone that doesn't match in skin tone. Having stated that, this particular ass hole accidentally hit my boy with his truck. Goofy was hurt and laying there and he realized that the dude wasn't dead, so, he brick him to death. Literally, he beat goofy with a brick he had in the back of his truck, threw him in said ditch and moved right along. What really burns my briquettes is the fact that absolutely nothing at all in any shape form or fashion what so ever happened to this fucker because Goofy's family, (or those who would've had to press charges) don't live in the state of GA. Upon further investigation the cops actually helped him out so that nothing but the accident would be all he was held accountable for. Today this human pile of shit was staring me in the face as i logged onto facebook, i sat contemplating what course of action to take. Or if i should even bother, ya know, letting sleeping dogs lie and the like. But at the same time this friend of mine died at the hands of this scott free ass hole, that's not something I'm just willing to charge to the game. Deaths gotta be easy because life is hard, but to be brought to death's door and forgotten about? No way, no man has been born better off dead, in fact Goofy had more reasons to live than said cocksucker ever will. Well my friends, forgive your enemies, but never forget there names.